Of what suits a Man and not a woman!

A college senior once remarked, ''Gargi, you are a girl, abusive words do not suit you!"

I argued, "I never used them to offend anybody, they were just a part of casual conversations we were having" ( I was referring to the typical conversations every college-going has at the nukkads/joints/hangout spots)

He replied saying that it was okay if he used it but slang does not suit a woman ! My rational feminist mind still wanted to argue and debate over it but then the cupid had hit me and I did not want to pick up a fight with the person I had my feelings engaged with. You know "the pehla nasha" kind of thing.

P.S : I was just 16.. and only later did I realize that this was BS!

Yes perhaps using slang in a conversation does make it sound vulgar( Though I will not debate on the fact that sometimes they sum up for the plethora of events/feelings we wish to express) ; in no manner then, should it even ''suit'' a man's vocab!

Again, when there is a bold discussion on topics such as sex; I am referring to open-ended public conversations,we do get a ''Ssssh... you are not suppose to talk about it loudly" comment.

I guess it again does not suit us!

Talking about menstruation to your male counterparts, cracking nasty jokes, drinking,smoking, watching/reading porn and there is a endless list that still falls under the head "does not suit women''.

Who on earth, gave these left-with-no-work folks a upper hand on deciding what suits a woman or not! If these gyani pundits want to put up an ethical background to these filthy remarks, then why be bias over it! How can one same parameter be justified for men and not for women! Why cant for-fun conversation skip the gender bias?

I don't want to get into the summary of what is ethical or not. We have a lot of  intellects in our society to do that, let alone spare them this list, for their tea time gupshup!

This is not a male bashing write-up! These are simply frustrating thoughts that every second woman vents out. 

Recently there was this ''choices'' bandwagon everybody was trying to jump at. I don't even intend to join it and add to its already increasing publicity!

But my version of choices is to let the woman of today be the way the she desires to be, the way she wants to be. Let her be, her individual self! That is possible when our collective social mind stops playing the for man and not for woman games.

Yes we are thankful that today we get a lot of exposure than that in the past but that again is no prize or favor.. we deserved it then, we deserve it now!

''I am a Woman Phenomenally. Phenomenal Woman, That's me"- Maya Angelou